Put phone away box

Week 9 Summary

Not a good week for graphs again, with 19h total - but 3h 30 was travels and utilities, then I spent 7h on Messenger (compared to 1-2h on a regular week) because I used it to video call my wife when she was away.

Take them away, I have consistent 12-14 hours, with 1h of doomscrolling a week, the rest is utilities, talking with friends, banking and switching between the apps.

Derailments

That being said I exhausted all my buffer on pick ups goal with 666 pick ups. Now the real game starts to keep it under 50 a day. This should be the final boss, as I can promise you that now I control total screen time.

I derailed in the phone in the box goal - I set ambitious goal to 4h a day, but my automatic integrations are very poor. To make it well, you really need a stateful device like I had. I set the commitment to 3h a day now (was 2h initially).

Thoughts

Since I use beeminder to change the life structurally perhaps for the first time (not anki or books goals) I have a few notes:

  • beeminder promotes micro habits and they don’t really help (strong opinion, weakly held). I fell into trap of microgoals like “no phone before 8 AM” etc. It’s a very bad thing to do. Design of the goals matters more than following the goal. In many cases, I think I confuse types of goals. One type is “setting the floor level” (phone pick ups, fall asleep time) and other is achieving your dreams (completing PhD, coding your app, learning Spanish etc).
  • beeminder is not the best tool to change the “architecture of the day”. Many of you check “fall sleep time” or “wake up time“, but I have intuition that the real problem is somewhere else (weak opinion, strongly held).

This is not a critique of beeminder, it’s just a very versatile tool that has some usage patterns and its own logic.

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I also want to say that all of you are missing out on not having a hard limit on scrolling apps.

Use https://jomo.so/ - just hard cap Facebook + X + Instagram + TikTok at 10 minutes a day combined, what could possibly happen? I think this is very basic thing that should be more popular. Also 1h of YouTube daily (since it has long-form content too) should be enough for many.

Even if you’re within healthy 20-30 minutes a day, it won’t hurt to elevate the standards.

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Because Jomo seems to be waitlist-stage for Android right now, for all of my fellow non-Apple-users, I would like to mention YourHour that I am using for this same purpose.

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Great point!

I gave myself some space during Christmas break, so that I am restarting everything now.

I don’t find total time challenging anymore, which I perceive as a personal success. Since I started this thread, I read about 20 books. This feels great.

I want to focus on two goals:

  • pick ups - I want to stay under 50 pick ups a day. This makes total screen time go down and eradicates compulsive checks. This is hard. Even at 1-2h a day I can have 70 pick ups. This iPhone metric isn’t perfect. Sometimes it reports me a pick up when I am in some other room. Nonetheless, it’s my fault to add remaining pick ups.
  • put phone away - time spent with phone away, this prevents me from using the phone before sleep and improves focus - think of pomodoro goals

on top of that I use Jomo to set hard limits for the apps.

In some time I will be back with more charts and images.

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I am slowly closing the topic, because the issue has been solved, solutions proven to work, there’s like 2-3 concrete options in the thread of how to track phone time with beeminder with physical device, without it etc. I recommend to copy and paste everything into GPT to outline you the methods, all the mistakes I made, some missing assumptions.

The mistake

I think there core mistake made here was treating the symptoms rather than the underlying problem. This is not a bad thing - it also works, gives a sense of achievement. Nonetheless, there are also good things related to phone use. Operating AI agents, reading, speaking with friends, repeating language material.

The underlying problem I identified was a loop:

  1. a lot of things on my plate
  2. failure to make significant progress in any of them
  3. promise yourself to compensate the time in the evening
  4. avoid commitment and escape to phone abuse

and go back to point 1 next morning.

I think this pattern, abstracting the “material” part from it, is very common. Simply swap the stressor, the reward and you’ve got your own loop with overeating, with binge drinking and so on. Change the point of view and then comes the narrative that the "willpower is a muscle”.

Global solutions

The core solution was to give up some projects or move their priority and focus on one at a time to get it done. This way, I manage to have them all:

  1. Much calmer life - hard to put a number on it, but I feel subjectively calmer
  2. Back to phone usage with relevant applications and use cases
  3. Change in the time quality, more books read and so on

I think I can also boil down the learning the fact that you have to have a clear goal in your life. In my opinion some boundaries might help, but clarity on the goal is the key. Then boundaries will emerge naturally to protect the goal.

General tips

Behavioural patterns aside, I think there are two concrete things you can always do, that will have positive effect on your life:

  1. Putting phone in the box; during some specific time it can help you with just being more present or achieve more. For me, that would be during the evenings with my family, for you it might be your learning time, work time, before sleep. Choose a trigger that should put the phone away and reconnect later.
  2. Having hard time limits on the dopamine apps (X, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok). They can be generous, like 1h a day, but still have them in place. You can use Jomo on iOS to achieve that.

New screen time campaign

I’ll run a new goal for the next month, very simple, that checks if I put phone away between 17 and 22 for at least 1h. This goal has many design advantages over my previous stack. Requires minimal setup, is easy to track - datapoint insertion happens right after the pick up as a first thing.

Given the time slot, I should be able to see the result in screen time report from Apple. I will log hours spent, so the total time reclaimed will be visible as my beeminder goal’s cumulative total. During past 3 weeks I spent about ~22h in front of the phone, but it’s structurally different time - working, learning, connecting with people.

In my previous poat:

Out of ~26h each week, 15h is dedicated to Chrome and an hour or two to YouTube. Another 2h is focused tasks (Anki, Duolingo, Beeminder) and another 2h is chores or work (text messages, maps, spotify). Then add another 5 on random noise (banking app, more YouTube or checking emails).

in the past weeks, leisure time hardly crossed 8h a week (that would be ~1h a day). This is acceptable.

My forecasted screen time is this:

Week Forecast
12.04 20h
19.04 18h
26.04 16h
3.05 14h

Relevant commitments:

I think it’s likely to anchor and stabilise around 18h - this was a big threshold last time, then positive and neutral use cases come into my way. Remember that these 18h will include Car Play, switching between the apps, notifications popping up in the middle of the night. It means 2h or less a day, including call to grandma and Anki.

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