Just seeing if Beeminder works for bringing me back on track. If you read this, please support me or give me a like or a comment or however it works on here. Obviously social support will increase the chances of success. I’m getting pretty bad with personal integrity, ie. sticking to any plan whatsoever. Therefore my metric is getting 3 things done per day on my Trello board which is set up in the format of Tony Robbins’ RPM. Chunking tasks. TheDuchess is one of the fun names I have for one of my roles (purposes) in life which is to be the female version of the Duke Kahanamoku, the greatest waterman that ever lived. Obviously I’ll never reach Olympic swimming greatness and introduce surfing to the rest of the world but that isn’t the point, it’s more the mental attitude and personality that I’d like to adopt. Commitment to being fit for the ocean and contributing to the community through surf lifesaving. However, this is only one of the several roles (purposes) I have on my Trello board.
The RPM has you giving groovy names to all your roles. A couple of my other names are Barefoot Babe (of Scott Pape’s Barefoot Investor) and Domestic Goddess. I have a total of 9 roles / goals / purposes in life… all with groovy names.
I hope to use this journal to remind myself of why I’m doing the Trello tasks and to stay on track if I’m about to veer off. Initially my WHY is that I’d like to feel fulfilled from day to day.
Oh thank you zedmango! RPM is Rapid Planning Method or Results Purpose Massive action plan. You just write down all the things on your to-do list and group them into themes. This is called “chunking”. Usually it ends up like: career, relationships, health, etc etc. So if you end up with a chunk of tasks and it’s all housework chores, you give yourself a groovy name to make it fun, like Domestic Goddess. I’m trying to buy a property so I call myself Property Mogul. I have a boyfriend & a dog I love so that list is called The G-GOAT & Furmum… short for greatest girlfriend of all time. Then I have Supergeek as I strive to be the geekiest scientist ever. Then Automated Income Architect for my online business activities. Then I have Fun Fun Fun and Relaxation. My problem is I get stuck in the YouTube and Facebook rabbit hole possibly all day and don’t even get done the things I truly enjoy like watching a movie or reading a book. I’m really hoping this method works to save me from the rabbit hole. I have $5 on the line.
Oh my gawd. I spent literally the entire day down the rabbit hole. Texting texts that will never be texted. I don’t want to talk about it in detail. What the heck is this behaviour? How will I guarantee this won’t happen tomorrow? Thank goodness for the Beeminder grace period. I’ll get this behaviour sorted out. Admittedly I have a history of addictive behaviour and I’m not going to try to fix that because it allows me this thing called hyperfocus which I can apply to big tasks like doing a post-grad university degree or doing an ironman triathlon. Things that take years of focus to do. I’ll figure this out. I have to. I just have to remember how I did it last time.
Much better day today. I downloaded a giant countdown timer on my iPad and had it countdown the time until the end of the day and also until I finish up at my current job which is about 109 days. That puts things into perspective. I’m going to do a quick 5 min style journal.
I’m grateful for 1) coffee out with my dog and having her sit there quietly and not disrupt anyone 2) new ski erg at the gym 3) boyfriend who did not freak out when I bought us a “couples will kit”. Things I could have done better today. 1) Maybe done a bit more food prep 2) started the financial folder 3) not dicked around with browser & YouTube. Things I did well 1) started straight on my tasks without even having breakfast 2) high fiving at the gym 3) keeping out of the surf when I don’t need to be in there 4) Did many things I enjoyed. Tomorrow I have swimming squad, cyclone Oma approaching, night shift, a giant hole on the street outside my house, Crossfit Open announcement. I’d love to make a start on my financials folder amd will, list all my debts and exactly how much they are and figure out a way to pay them. Also any anticipated expenses like car-related costs. It would also be great if I knew what my future career was going to be. Beeminder tasks done for the day I believe. I’m going to make a slight modification. Instead of 3 Trello tasks per day, I’m going to go for 15 tasks per week. I must must must do my transfusion survey tomorrow. As the champion of RCPA scheduling, supergeek scientist, it would be against my constitution to miss this QA deadline.
Just came off night shift. It wasn’t too bad of a night, stayed back because all routine work was running late and on top of that I had an antibody. Must remember to treat every blood banking speci as if it had a complex antibody in order to apply that Ben Bergeron theory of how long it actually takes to do something ie. if travelling to the airport, you don’t estimate your future travel by the fastest time it has actually taken you to do it, you take the slowest time such as the time there was heavy traffic. Anyhoos, my challenge is to recover quickly from night shift. As it stands, even when I don’t get a call out, I’m unable to have a productive day the following day. How can this change? I have no idea. Better nutrition is probably a one-percenter. No more Pringles from 7-11 on the way home as a reward for night shift. Who rewards themselves for night shift anyway? I mean, jeesuz, does there need to be a reward every time I go to work? When did it become that I need to buy a coffee in order to start work and have Pringles on the way home? Next night shift, I will have to go via Kawana Way. There’s not going to be traffic anyway. Goddam it. It hurts to kill the old me. But she must die. As for my coffee problem. I think water is the solution. No scientific pun intended. Then maybe if that doesn’t work I’ll order some theanine online. Also the other thing I can do is just withdraw (again) temporarily from society. How the heck to non-coffee drinkers function and integrate themselves into society? Today, woke up, probably 4 hours sleep. It’s the big day of Crossfit Open 19.1. I knew I couldn’t compete so I showed up to help judge. I watched for a bit then got to judge Dorothy who was my running buddy previously. She’s very cool. Anyway I need to stop strategising for this. It’s only the first workout and I’m not going for sheep stations. I have agreement from most girls in my detox group that it would be ok for me to change the group into a general fitness and nutrition discussion group. Obviously I’m ditching the detox product plan. Ditching the probiotics plan (that’s old news anyway). The theory is that since the rest of my life centres around fitness that a business centred around women’s nutrition for fitness would be suitable for me. Something I can enjoy day in day out. Something with a purpose I inwardly and outwardly believe in. Okay so in summary, the one thing that requires desperate attention is the smooth transition of refinancing. At the same time I’m re-designing my own personal finances. I wouldn’t be surprised if I’ve blown all of this fortnight’s salary already I’ve exhibited such bad consumer behaviour, just playing into every consumer trick in the book. I have no idea when in my life I started doing that but it would be great to remember the day I thought it was ok to start consuming things and purchasing things on a daily basis. How young was I? What job was I doing? Was there something emotional that began the habit? I did start placating myself or self-soothing by purchasing food or coffee. Also watching random YouTube videos. I totally do this to avoid reality. How about I self-soothe by working on my finances and my business? Organising myself, cleaning the house in order to be able to nail it at work, business and sport. Write in this journal, write in morning pages, do a mini-gratitude, study Stoic philosophy. How’s that for a self-soothing plan? Everytime I feel bored, in pain whether it’s emotional or physical, everytime I’m tired BOOM have a drink of water then check accounts, look at the business and finances to do list, clean something!
Not to be hlepful (giving unasked-for help that’s not actually helpful), but you might also consider trying general strategies for dealing with anxiety (the thing you’re self-soothing from) and executive dysfunction (having difficulty starting things, losing track of time, ending up stuck down rabbit holes you had no intention of going down). Honestly, just working the night shift is enough to mess up the ability of your brain to function, so I don’t think you should blame yourself so hard.
These aren’t the BEST links on the topic but it’s what I currently had open (since I, too, have exactly the same issues, although mostly AT work rather than after work):
(the last one in particular I think is the most important, as you mentioned in your OP: rebuilding your trust in yourself, ie your personal integrity, is what lets any system work at all, and the most reliable way of doing that is very, very, VERY small steps at a time, rather than trying to become a new person all at once.)
Lanthala, thank you so much for those links. The terminology Executive Dysfunction is exactly what’s going on here. Unable to execute anything (bar one or two things). Also I’m very hard on myself after night shift and I’ve been reading about our chronobiological clock. I’ve got a few things working against me but due to increasing bills eg. my car broke down today and I got my tax bill and my property strategist found a duplex… I have no choice but to deal with them and succeed at whatever my plans are. As for stimulants, I know one other scientist and one other paramedic who do not drink any coffee whatsoever. It works out well for them. I think it will work out well financially for me too. So, a double advantage. Great advice about the VERY small steps. Another thought I had was theanine. Spaced out doses of theanine during the day. Increasing to find the optimum dose over a month. Matcha green tea. A multivitamin or a B complex vitamin. Probiotic. Melatonin and valerian at night particularly the normal night after night shift when my body thinks we’re meant to be awake in the middle of the night. (I’m on the worst possible type of night shift called “rotating roster”, in other words, I do all shifts, plus on call so potentially 16 hour shifts.) I was thinking that night shift is not natural behaviour. Unnatural. Which, if I want to sustain this type of lifestyle, would call for supplements or drugs.
I have totally found a way that sticks and I look forward to using every day. Notion. Sorry, it’s not Beeminder. Notion… that program has everything anyone could ever need in journaling and goal achievement. So my set up is as follows: I have a page for each week named Week 10, Week 11, etc etc. Then after the week is over I file away into Previous Weeks. In each week I make notes on each day. I do the same thing for my gym workouts in a handwritten Day-Per-Page diary and I have found that this system of writing down what happened (or the plan) and what I could have done better on the bottom half of the page has worked and put me into a self-sustaining cycle of continuous improvement. So I thought why can’t I do this for the other things in my life. The problem was, there are so many aspects to life, not just gym movements, sets and reps (wait is there actually more to life than that). Anyway I thought I’d try to base my Notion notebook on that since that has worked previously for me. I’m not the world’s best weightlifter / crossfitter by any means but I make improvements every time and the satisfaction of learning is ummm satisfying and I would was to rate myself for strength, fitness, etc etc that is one aspect of my life that I would give 10 out of 10… so why not model everything else on that. I’ve completed 2 full ironmans, can swim a very long distance, can swim a very short distance very fast, my physique is muscular, body fat percentage well in the teens, have bodysurfed at Pipe, surfing is coming along slowly, can Rx lots of things in crossfit class. I’m thinking the whole point to achieving goals is not in the achieving but in the doing of the steps on the way there. The learning of a new skill. Then being scared to ask the other girl, how do you do that, then having her joyfully show me then watch me then show me again and being generous and patient. There’s a lost joy in doing that which I want to apply to every other part of my life. Who cares that I’m really bad at something, the joy is in connecting, having someone show you, failing, and looking really crap at it, then practicing for ages, then having it look a little better, then a little bit better and better. That’s how my finances are going to be. That’s how my business and career are going to be. Sorry it hasn’t been Beeminder but I think I needed a notetaker that has the functionality of Check boxes, bullet points, linking websites, colours, highlights, emojis, etc etc.
Sure, here are the links to Week 10 and Week 11.
Notion is an app on your mobile phone as well as desktop. Synced. Well, I realised I can’t fit in the different aspects of my life every day. So I’ve currently set the bar really low and the goal is just to do one task each day that was preplanned and part of one of my goals. I was getting so bad that I was doing zero tasks per day, just spiralling downwards. You’ll see the notes on all my insecurities and addictions and how I’m attempting to work around them or flip them. I’m just grateful my addictions are to do with sport and watching incredibly successful people give advice on YouTube and not food, gambling or drugs.
This is another image of what it looks like with the toggles drop list function. It’s also really cool that they have a NASA image database you can choose for the header.